Cleaning tip, Makeup reviews, Moisturizers, Uncategorized

These are a few of my favorite things

Happy Saturday everyone! It’s been a stupid busy week around here..I tried super duper hard to blog throughout the week, but DAMN!

This week is not going to be JUST makeup, cause I get it..not all you lovely babes like to wear it..but then again, if you don’t like makeup, why the fuck are you reading my blog???! (Sorry…not sorry) no but seriously, thank you for reading my blog even if you aren’t a makeup whore like I am. Β I am going to share my favorite tip for cleaning (cause I’m a fucking tool and love cleaning) and my favorite way to relax..because no matter how much I love cleaning, while I’m doing it, I inevitably get pissed off at my family for the mess they make..filthy animals!! (Kidding. .I love my guys) and I need to unwind.

So first up is my new makeup/skin care reviews:

I picked this up at my local drugstore for about $12. I’ve noticed that since I started using my new L’Oreal ProGlow Foundation which is a super dewy finish, when I use my regular powder blush I look like a cracked out clown, no matter how light I apply it. That’s because the dewy finish is somewhat “wet” and it grabs the pigment of the blush. So I figured I would start out with a cheaper blush, hence this stuff.

This stuff looks pretty cool. It has a very weird texture..kind of like a powdery gel kinda thing. Honestly I’ve never felt anything like it..and that is saying ALOT because I have had my hands in a lot of people’s different orifices (at work you PERVS!! And a couple times in college πŸ˜‰ jk) Β and never felt this kind of texture. But I soldiered on, hoping for a nice glowy flush of my cheeks…you know the one right?…that little bit of color in your cheeks after a quick romp with your man…except no sex head) flush.

Well…..I didn’t get that from this blush. I got nothing…there is barely any pigment in this so I had to keep adding and adding until I finally saw a little flush of color. I roughly calculated at this rate, this $12 pot of blush will last me 4 or 5 for sure not worth the money. Maybe if you have very very fair skin this would work for you, but it’s 2 big fat thumbs down for me. Β  Β I could have spent 12 dollars on batteries and gotten “multiple cheek flushes” πŸ˜‰πŸ˜‰

Next up is my new favorite moisturizer:

I again bought this at my local drugstore for around $15….and believe me it is worth it. I have super sensitive skin that gets super ass chapped in the winter and this shizzle is the B.O.M.B!!!! It absorbs quickly and moisturises very well. It is a nighttime formula which means it doesn’t have any SPF in it…I know..I am a fucking rebel! But honestly, I don’t use a moisturizer with SPF because it burns my skin. My primer has SPF so that will have to do. If I end up looking like a California raisin, I’m cool with that..

Now on to the cleaning portion of the evening…

I’ve got three words for you…..Vinegar, Dish Soap and Chlorine Free Bleach (ok..that’s more than three words but it’s my blog and screw you lol). Β I use a mixture of these 3 things to clean the nastiest place in my shower.

My shower gets funky…I have tried umpteen dozen kinds of Soap Scum Remover and it does NOT work. But I found this “recipe” on Pinterest and gave it a shot…and Holy Shit Balls!!! This stuff works!

What you do:

Mix together equal parts of Dawn Dishsoap, hot Vinegar (I heat it up in the microwave), and Chlorine Free Bleach (which is basically Hydrogen Peroxide). Anyway put all of these into a spray bottle and gently swirl it around. Don’t shake this motherfucka or you’ll have stinky blue foam all over yourself..and I will point and laugh 😝

Once you’ve mixed this up, spray your entire shower and be generous with it. Then turn on your bathroom fan (this shit stinks 😷) and close your bathroom door. Go sit your lovely ass on the couch with a glass of wine for the next 2 hours. After a couple hours, simply wipe down the surfaces you sprayed, rinse it and VOILA!!! No scrubbing, no sweating, no soap scum swearing..just easy peasy.

Now after you’ve cleaned your shower, you deserve some “me” time. I’m talking about self care. We all need to make a conscious effort to do at least one thing for ourselves everyday. I’m not talking about taking a shit sans kids or dogs or cats in the bathroom with you. I mean something to just be quiet with yourself and be in your moment..

I found this app on ITunes. It is called RespiRelax. The app is only in French but it really doesn’t matter because it doesn’t talk to you.

You simply start the 5 minute timer and breath along with the pretty little bubble. When the bubble rises, you take a gentle yet deep abdominal breath and exhale as the bubble falls. It is wonderfully slows your heart rate and breathing down. You may find yourself yawning or hear your stomach grumbling while doing this breathing exercise..all good signs that your parasympathetic nervous system is taking over (the Rest and Digest system). So go ahead lovelies and take some time for you.Β 

I’d love to hear back from you in the comments section about your favorite way to “just be”.

Until next time..hope you all find time to laugh and live πŸ’–


Here We Go…

Hi everyone!

After months of thinking about starting a blog, I decided what the hell! Maybe millions of people will want to read about my ever so boring life punctuated by the occasional trip to Sephora or (and much, MUCH more likely), no one will give a shit except for me..but I’m gonna do it anyway..cause I’m like that..tough and all πŸ˜‚

I am a 39 year old wife and mother to 3 (2 step children who are fanfuckingtastic adults, I must say) and a biological son who’s getting ready to graduate high school and leave his poor old mom alone…can you tell I’m going to have empty nest syndrome SOB???? Β I have been a practicing paramedic for 19 years and was diagnosed 3 years ago with PTSD following a horrendous incident that I’ll delve into another time.

I LOVE makeup πŸ’„Β πŸ’„…really it’s an addiction but I downplay it to my hubby and everyone else….do they have a rehab centre for foundation junkies?? If so, “they’ll never take me alive!! Ha ha ha

But seriously..ok maybe not seriously but you know what I mean…makeup is something that I love and I love to share with others. So this blog will just be me sharing new product finds, tips and tricks and on and on. But not just for makeup…I want a place where we can share about life (which is super fucking hard sometimes), trying to be healthy…evened out with some recipes for treats…cause lets face it, no one like to eat lettuce 365 days a year! Can I get an AMEN?! I’ll share my struggles living with PTSD and a house with too much testosterone in it

a quick little side note…I swear like a drunken sailor so if you aren’t in to finding creative ways to use the word “fucktard”, this might not be the right place for you..